every dog has it's dawn of the dead

snouty · every dog has it's dawn of the dead

dobermann fred
jumped up and said
this can't be real!
I can't be dead!

he wagged his tail
and scratched his head
it was dobermann pete
was the dog that was dead!

*dobermann pete and doberman fred get up on the stage to take a bow*

*they bow*

*suddenly it goes into slo-mo; doberman pete turns and reaches into his waistcoat (yeah, he's wearing a waistcoat, did I not mention that?) and draws out a beretta, doberman fred shouts, 'noooo!' in slow motion and dives to the floor, rolls over and pulls a 'throwing star' out of his coat...*

to be continued... by you, if you fancy it!

Ninjadmin

doberman fred beats pete to the draw and throws his throwing star into the barrel of doberman petes gun causing it to backfire, for doberman pete everything goes into matrix time and he just sees a bunch of numbers where the world was, he cocks his head to the right and the bullet flies past it, hitting an 'innocent' bystander, he discards his beretta and his waistcoat and reches for his katana, fred has done exactly the same and the two lock their gazes with ruthless intent

"the soul blade will never be yours doberman pete" he utters with intent

"so you keep saying" pete replies, with a venom beyond himself

somewhere deep inside himself, pete feels a power stirring, one that is not his own, a voice he had not heard in this life, but which was somehow more familiar to him than his own mothers voice.......

snouty

fantastic!!! (I'm trying to find a smilie with the clap, but it's taking too long) doberman pete is cool!

'Pete, you will defeat the pooch and take the soul blade, and you will own a delicatessen, perhaps the largest delicatessen in all of grimsby, and you will use the soul blade to dice cucumbers for the raita, and people will journey from far and wide as hull and scunthorpe to taste your wares...'

so saying the voice faded, and a beautiful, empowered female dalek arrived on the stage... it was as if time stood still, in fact, for fred it had- there he was frozen, while pete marvelled at the spectacle before him...

Ninjadmin

none of my smilies have got the clap

they're all good clean girls

Ninjadmin

the people of hull rejoiced, at last their people had a continental style delicatessen and a new dawn approached, no longer would they face the grim oppresion of leeds and the barbarian invaders from middlesborough

some time passed, and all was good

but as with all new dawns, the daybreak brought new problems, after a while, all anyone bought was chicken tikka baps, the people came to resent the chicken special and tuna mayonnaise because it was seen as a pariah, an insult to them, a false prophet

doberman pete became bored and angry, people said that his brain was infected by devils, then one night, everything changed.....

snouty

...and they stopped sayin that. which was nice. for a change.

and then suddenly, the sexy, empowered radfem dalek appeared once again to dobermann pete in a vision, saying 'take thee over there, and dig in the soil of the field with the banyan tree (it's in wigan) and you will find riches untold in a little glass slipper, enough riches to open... ANOTHER 2 DELICATESSENS, one each for Hull and Whitby!'

and with that, the beautiful dalek disappeared, and a warthog trotted up to pete with a shovel...

Ninjadmin

snouty

banyan trees are so NOT east coast; we need a bit of northwest action!

so saying, snouty picked up the throwing star that dobermann fred had dropped and flung it with all his might... the star crossed mighty oceans... sailed through trade winds, through the night sky shimmering under the stars, and slowly started to fall over korea... it fell and fell and then suddenly slammed into ninjaboy's desk at his TEFL school, scratching the word 'OI!' into the desk with its finals spins...

'let that be a warning," said the butch warthog with the smashing pecs...

then snouty suddenly remembered that ninjaboy was back home visiting his folks in Newcastle...

Ninjadmin

i may buy more drink

the internet is suddenly good again

snouty

*robot voice* "BUY MORE BEER! BUY MORE BEER! NINJA BOY SHOULD BUY MORE BEER!"

Ninjadmin

i bought more beer

should have bought wine, am not in the story writing mood now

snouty

you iz like the charles bukowski of the inteynets... you should buy a pint of 'grandad.'

Ninjadmin

i might dump my girlfriend this weekend and just sit and drink and write stories on the internet instead

snouty

you do make me laugh, ninjakillbotsboy!

(((((((((ninjaboy!)))))))))