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Soreenkid · Guest

PAUL OAKENFOLD aka NAKED FOOL

Me, myself and my Genius.

(a diary of my recording process)

Day 1: Did an interview with The NME. Mentioned I like Radiohead. Got a bit confused when they asked which songs I like. NME think I'm great.

Day 2: Went shopping for sunglasses. Shouted 'I am PAUL OAKENFOLD' a lot.

Day 3: Went shopping for sunglasses.

Day 4: Listened to the first two tracks of U2's latest album Got bored. Listened to The Scissor Sisters. I like them.

Day 5: Wrote and recorded 8 new album tracks while wearing sunglasses.

Day 6: New U2 song was released... it's great. Won't get to listen to it till tomorrow.

Day 7: Listened to start of new U2 song. Got bored. Remixed new U2 song. Sent single to manager for immediate release.

Day 8: DJed at Cream. Was great. Had sex with groupie.

Day 9: Had more sex with groupie. Kicked groupie out. Looked in the mirror for a while.

Day 10: Went shopping for sunglasses.

Day 11: Received letter from Thom Yorke

"Dear Mr Oakenfold,

I am writing to inform you that we will be blocking the release of your 'remix' of our new single. This is NOT, as you stated when we blocked the release of your "remix" of Street Spirit, because we don't like dance music. We love dance music. We are blocking your "remix" because it is banal,cliched and flies in the face of everything we were trying to achieve when we wrote the song.

Thom Yorke"

They just don't like dance music.

Day 12: Went shopping for sunglasses for photo-shoot.

Day 13: Went to photo-shoot. Did an interview with Q Magazine. Mentioned I like Radiohead, but they don't like dance music. Nasty interviewer said Kid A 'has its roots in dance music'. Got a bit confused when they asked mewhether I think Pyramid Song is about Dante's Inferno. Q Magazine think I'm great.

Day 14: Went to two more photo-shoots. Had sex with two groupies at once.Very good day.

Day 15: Kicked groupies out. Did an interview with Rolling Stone Magazine. Mentioned I like Radiohead. Got a bit confused when they asked me whether I think Radiohead have been progressing musically since OK Computer.

Day 16: DJed at Ministry of Sound in sunglasses. Found it hard to see. Was great. Had sex with groupies.

Day 17: Repeated my own name (PAUL OAKENFOLD) 10,000 times. Kicked groupie out after she laughed at me.

Day 18: Wrote and recorded the last 20 tracks for my album. Gave album to manager for release.

Ninjadmin · Posted: Sat Nov 18, 2006 10:09 pm Post subject:

sorry but you could do better

combine your witty cynicism with your angsty bipolarity and write something about you

Soreenkid · Guest

I amm turning over a new leaf:

Goodbye misanthropy
Hello unbridled altruism

So go fuck yourself!

Ninjadmin · Posted: Sun Nov 19, 2006 4:12 pm Post subject:

YAY!!!